Adoption Perspectives

Having two adopted nephews and an adopted granddaughter, I've been interested in adoption issues for a number of years.

Beth O'Malley, an adult adoptee, adoptive mother -- and foster care / adoption social worker, is the author of Adoption Lifebooks. I have found her monthly newsletters, which I've been receiving for I-don't-know-how-many years (since way before my granddaughter was born in 2011), inspiring and educational.

When I learned, in the late fall of 2010, that my oldest daughter was advocating for International Special Needs adoption (see "Pam's Sparrows" on the left sidebar), I became even more interested, and started following a lot of adoption blogs. All of these blogs are written from the perspective of the adoptive parent. As I've read, I've thought, "This is great -- but what about those who were adopted as children, and who are now adults? What is their take on all this? What advice would they have for those 'in the trenches' right now?"

There are scads of informational "how to . . ." books and articles out there, written by all kinds of adoption "experts" (some of whom seem to be writing from a strictly "theoretical" perspective with zero personal experience), but precious little (that I've seen) written by those who have actually walked the road of being adopted themselves, with all the challenges that brings, and who have now reached adulthood.

Recently, I've started stumbling on blogs written by adult adoptees. Here is one by Lynn Steinburg (A Decision to Search) that I found this morning. Lynn writes as a now-married adoptee who, with her husband, recently completed an international adoption themselves -- which gave Lynn the "push" she needed to actively pursue finding her own biological roots. (At the moment, she's only written "part 1"; I'm really looking forward to reading the rest of the story as she writes it.)

I'd like to include one other resource, for "whatever it's worth." Christi M, at Parenting that Heals, was not adopted herself, but she and her husband have adopted 4 older girls (after raising 4 boys). Christie speaks from the perspective of what seems to be really working with her girls, especially in helping them understand and deal with the hurts of the past, recognizing the reality of what they've been through, yet helping them to grow beyond their past without letting it define their future. I have read all of her posts, and have been blessed by them.

While no two situations are the same (as Lynn learned), it is my hope that these links will be beneficial to those who are raising adopted children, to those who are in the adoption process, to those who are contemplating adoption -- and even to those who know an adoptee (of any age), or who are just interested for whatever reason.